Is It Ever Too Soon to Introduce Your Dog to Your Partner?

It finally happened. After years of bad Hinge dates, situationships and being unfairly ghosted, you’ve found someone you actually like hanging out with. Maybe you’re even thinking about moving in together. But before it’s time to make a huge leap like sharing a wardrobe or introducing them to your parents, you need to introduce them to the most special person in your life: your dog.

Dogs are pretty good judges of character, and you may be worried about what happens if your new partner and beloved pooch don’t click right away. Who’s going to have to go? (Well, we all know that it’s a case of last in the door, first out.) To make sure that important meeting goes smoothly and that no new partners have to get dumped, there are steps you can take.

When is the right time to make the intro?

First of all, though: How soon is too soon? Emma Scales-Theobald, a canine scientist and behaviorist, says that when introducing your dog to a new partner, it really depends on the individuals how soon is too soon. “Some people like to bring their dog on a first date and therefore meet potential partners straight away,” Scales-Theobald says. “But for others, it might be best to leave it until you’re more sure the relationship is going to develop.”

She also affirms what we already knew; dogs are great judges of character. “If you’re thinking that things with your new partner could turn into a serious relationship, your dog could help give the final seal of approval,” she says. It’s then important to make sure they and your dog can get along well, especially if you’re thinking of moving in together.

Dog trainer Karen Wigglesworth adds that when you’re deciding when to schedule the first meet-and-greet, it’s best to go on vibes. “If you have a new partner that likes dogs, and you have a relaxed dog happy to meet new people, it’s never too soon to introduce them slowly in short bursts on neutral territory at the start,” she says. “The meetings should always be positive, kind, and healthy to build trust and a bond longer term.”

It also entirely depends on your dog. If they’re a rescue or deal with trauma, you may have to move at a particularly slow pace. “Some dogs are very sociable and enjoy meeting everyone. However, some dogs are fearful of new people and sometimes have a fear around a particular gender. For these dogs, it can be stressful meeting new people, so it’s best to wait until you feel the relationship may become serious,” Scales-Theobald says. Similarly, if your new partner is anxious around dogs, it can be best to wait until they are ready to meet your dog, rather than rushing them.

Wigglesworth says going too fast into an intro is especially important if your dog becomes stressed, anxious, or uncomfortable in the presence of an unknown person. She says that warning signals to look out for include: heaving, panting, growling, averting eye contact, yawning out of context, hiding, air snapping and lip licking. If this happens, your dog needs space and you need to avoid sudden movements. You may also want to seek additional professional support for a future meeting.

Scales-Theobald says that if this does occur, you risk giving your dog a bad first impression of your partner. “This can cause stress and anxiety for your dog and negative associations,” she says, adding that some dogs may feel the new partner is an intruder. 

Keep things as normal as possible for your pup.

Per Scales-Theobald, some dogs may also start to get clingy, jealous, or even disobedient. Particularly if you meet in their home, the introduction of someone new could be a big disruption to their routine. Depending on how much their routine matters to them, this could really affect them. If they seem to be disturbed, you should offer them plenty of attention and help them to feel included while working on building the relationship between your partner and dog.

Scales-Theobald says that if this happens, you can work on including your partner in your dog’s routine — such as their walks, meals, and play time. This will help your dog start to see them as part of their daily schedule and life. You should also let your partner in on your dog’s routines and general rules so that they can follow them as closely as possible and avoid disruption.

If you feel ready to make the introduction, there are ways to make sure that the first meeting goes as smoothly as possible. Scales-Theobald suggests meeting in a neutral area rather than at your home at first, which can be helpful for your dog to feel more relaxed.“

This is particularly the case if they have a tendency to feel territorial or if they are anxious,” she says. “Ideally, meeting on a few dog walks will be best. Ask your partner to join you walking in the same direction. Dogs can feel threatened by someone who greets them head-on. Meeting while they're distracted by the smells, sights and sounds on their walk can help to take some of the focus off the new person.” Bribery also works well; get your new partner to bring tasty treats or a toy so that they build a positive association with the new person.

Make sure everyone is chill.

Wigglesworth adds that it’s important for both parent and partner to be calm and relaxed and take it slow. Try meeting on a few dog walks before you bring them into your home. You should pay attention to how your dog is feeling.

“Your dog should be showing some of the following signs in their presence: relaxed body and face, a lovely relaxed bottom and tail wag, happy to come in and say hello, often a dog will present a ‘play bow’ (bottom in the air, front chest and legs on the floor),” Wigglesworth says. 

Introducing someone new into your life is a big deal, and letting them meet your dog is a symbol of commitment. That can make it feel overwhelming, but the most essential thing is to not rush it and not to worry. Your dog loves you, and even if it doesn’t go well at first, they’re likely to accept anyone who cares for you half as much as they do.