Should You Include Your Dog in Your Wedding? Everything You Need to Know

We know millennials are choosing pets over kids. When it comes to their weddings, many couples pick their dogs over traditional ring bearers, groomsmen, and bridesmaids, too. According to a 2021 WeddingWire survey, 91 percent of pet parents celebrate with their dog in some way, and 30 percent involve them in the actual ceremony.

From the moment I got engaged, I loved the idea of including my pup in our wedding. But is it really a good idea? How do we know our dogs will behave — not to mention enjoy themselves — on our big day? Should your pup be there for your ceremony, reception, or both? Is it realistic to think your excitable dog can safely deliver your rings to the end of the aisle? We consulted professional trainers and wedding planners and came up with six things to consider to help you decide if, and how, you should include your pup in your wedding.

1. Your wedding venue

Are pets allowed at your wedding venue?

Even the best dog wedding fantasies fall flat if pups aren’t welcome at the church or reception hall. If you’re set on your pup celebrating your big day, start venue shopping with that in mind. A family member’s backyard, rustic barn, or other outdoor location will probably have looser restrictions than a formal church or ballroom.

“Not all venues are pet friendly, and that can throw a wrench into your wedding day if your dog isn't allowed to be there and you really wanted them to be,” says Samantha MacLean, owner of Sun’s Out Paws Out Pet Services, which provides wedding attendants for dogs (yes, that's right, someone to care of your pup at the venue while you get married).

“Most couples will opt to have us pick up their dog in the morning to help ensure that all their mental and physical enrichment needs are met throughout the day,” MacLean says. “Then we pop in and out from a ‘home base’ location — like a hotel room, quiet part of the venue, or even an air-conditioned vehicle — when the dog is needed most.”

Is there space for your dog to have quiet time?

The sheer length of a wedding celebration can be exhausting for our pets — most dogs aren’t capable of being “on” for seven or eight hours straight. Karishma Warr, trainer and head of behavior at Calm Canine Academy, explains that fatigue can take a toll on their comfort level and outward behavior. “Dogs need more sleep than we do, and changes to their routines can be difficult.” It can be hard to get enough rest among wedding-day commotion, and adult dogs usually spend nearly half the day asleep.

2. Your celebration plans

Will your wedding be overwhelming for a dog?

While we love spending time with our dogs, it’s important to realize not every situation is their idea of fun. “Weddings involve socializing on a scale dogs are not usually used to,” Warr says. “Your dog might be super social with guests and the people who live in your home, but are they ready to be social with hundreds of guests around them at once?”

Loud noises, like music over a speaker system, can be acutely painful for dogs with sensitive hearing. (The average pup can hear high-frequency sounds more than four times farther away than humans.) “Screaming and singing can confuse our dogs, too,” Warr notes. People often act differently at big celebrations because it’s a time to let loose and celebrate. Human attendees know the context of what’s going on. Dogs don’t.

Plus, your guests aren’t the only ones who might behave unusually on your wedding day. It’s normal for you and your partner to be stressed. “You might be sweating, or your heart is beating fast, and your dog can pick up on this,” Warr says. “If I were a dog, I’d feel overwhelmed seeing those changes in my guardian.”

“We always have a realistic conversation with clients regarding what is best for their dog and what they can and can't handle,” MacLean adds. “The priority on wedding day is the mental health and wellness of the dog.”

Will you — or someone else you trust — be available to meet your dog’s needs?

A packed event schedule can make it hard to find time to meet your pup’s needs. “When there is too much going on, dog walks, potty breaks, and feeding times often get overlooked,” says Elise, owner and wedding coordinator of Keen Events — which was named after her dog, Keene — in Portland, Oregon. (Elise asked to be identified by her first name only.)

But if we’re asking them to take part in a celebration, it’s critical our dogs feel fulfilled beforehand. MacLean says an off-leash leash run at a private park or a long decompression walk can help set dogs up for success on wedding day. On top of physical exercise, forms of mental enrichment — like eating treats from a simple puzzle toy — can help antsy pups relax.

“We recommend our couples have their dogs with them in the morning as they’re getting ready,” Elise says. “This is typically when there’s less commotion with just the wedding party.” When the ceremony and celebration hit full swing, she encourages couples to hand their pups over to a sitter for the rest of the event. This is a clear consensus among pet professionals: Whether you hire a trusted trainer or enlist a friend, having a dedicated dog attendant can help your pup’s participation run smoothly. “Most of my clients tell me it was such a relief to know I was there taking care of their dogs,” Warr recalls.

3. Your dog’s temperament

“Ask how your dog will do in a crowded environment,” Elise recommends. Some pets are naturally more suited to large events (think about social-butterfly therapy dogs) while others would rather avoid chaos at all costs.

Warr looks at temperament considerations as a scale. “At one end are the dogs where we have to say, ‘Nope, they cannot attend at all.’ At the other, are the dogs we aren’t really worried about. They’ll hang out for a while and be happy to relax in a room of their own the rest of the time.” They say most dogs fall somewhere in the middle of the spectrum; they are well-suited for some parts of a typical wedding day but struggle with others.

MacLean says it’s possible to include nervous dogs in weddings with thoughtful planning. “Dogs who are fear-reactive to large crowds or new people, or who get overstimulated by different noises or camera flashes, require workarounds. In some cases, we just take a few photos with the couple in a neutral area.” This way, you can capture some special moments with your four-legged family at no cost to their wellbeing.

“I like to say to ask the dog instead of the person,” Warr says. “If you were to give your dog the full context of what your wedding was going to be like and ask them if they wanted to come, would they say yes? Or would they be unsure?” Try to put your human emotions aside.

Of course, we want our dogs to be present at big life events — but what will they get out of it? If the answer is “joy and fulfillment,” don’t hesitate to start planning your pup’s involvement. If it’s “stress,” take a moment to reconsider. “We have to think about if it’s safe, if it’s kind, and if a dog has been given the skills to be successful at a huge celebration,” Warr says.

4. Your pup’s training

On top of wanting our dogs to feel comfortable with wedding celebrations, we also need them to be polite. Your pup’s behavior is the last thing you want to worry about on the big day.

Warr says: “Training a dog for a wedding can be advanced as settling around massive distractions, loose-leash walking down a crowded aisle, even holding a ring basket and wearing clothes or as basic as simply being able to eat food in an unfamiliar place.” They recommend starting with your individual dog, asking what scenarios they’ll face at your ceremony or reception, and then identifying key skills they will need to master ahead of the big day. Will your best friend sit next to you at the altar? Will they join you for your first dance? Are you content to simply snap a few photos with your pup between the chaos?

“Looking back, I’d do a lot of things differently and incorporate my dogs only with event-specific training,” says Elisha Jennings-Snavely, a dog parent whose pups walked down the aisle at her wedding. (She now trains dogs professionally.) She was hoping for a cute moment but instead ended up with photos of her dogs pulling on the leash to get to her.

If she could do it all over again, she says she’d take steps, like getting them accustomed to taking cues from others. This is important because dogs often struggle to perform known skills in unfamiliar contexts. (Trainers call this generalizing.) Just because your dog can keep a loose leash on your regular walking route doesn’t mean they’ll be able to do the same thing down the aisle — especially if someone they don’t know as well is holding the leash or they’re wearing a new outfit for the occasion.

Know that even advanced training isn’t a magic fix to include a fearful dog in your wedding celebration. “Training does not mean removing feelings,” Warr explains. We can teach dogs skills to help them navigate different environments — but they still have their own internal experiences. Try to structure a shy dog’s part of the celebration in a way that puts less pressure on their natural preferences, rather than relying on obedience to get them through.

5. Your vendors and guests

“Ensure everyone on your wedding team is OK with your dog attending,” MacLean says. This communication allows your vendors — photographer, videographer, emcee, catering staff, and anyone else bringing your day together — to plan ahead. Your team might also influence your decisions. Some venues have health codes that mean they can’t serve food in an environment where pets are present, for example.

The same goes for guests. Your friends and family are there for you, and they might not all know your dog. Warr says their team gets a lot of mileage with a funny-yet-informative “don’t be creepy” handout that helps attendees understand what kind of behavior can be overwhelming to a pup. “We also might put signs on the dog like ‘don’t feed me’ to give guests important information, or even announce their entrance over the loudspeaker to prepare everyone.”

6. What your dog will do

If you have read all this and think your dog would be a great addition to your wedding day, go for it. Here’s how you can involve them.

At your wedding ceremony

• Ring-bearer: Some pet parents train their dog to deliver the wedding rings down the aisle with adorable results. For pups who haven’t mastered a “hold” cue, collar and harness attachments can keep the ring box secure.

• Bridal party: “Best dogs” and “dogs of honor” traipse down the aisle with the rest of your bridal party before sitting with you at the altar. If your pup is a little antsy, a designated dog attendant can help them settle just off to the side.

• Wedding witness: In 23 states, your pet can serve as one of your wedding witnesses. This is a great option for dogs who struggle in a chaotic party environment. Create an intimate setting where your pup “signs” your marriage certificate for cute memories with minimal stress.

At your wedding reception

• First dance: Bold pups can join the happy couple for a family first dance. At my own wedding, my husband and I slow-danced for half a song of our own before inviting our Australian Cattle Dog to play her favorite tug game on the dance floor. Some ambitious couples choreograph full freestyle dance routines with their athletic companions.

• Just hanging out: Depending on your guest list and reception space, some dogs enjoy freely socializing for part of the day.

Remember, you can include your dog without requiring them to attend the entire celebration. “I always ask couples why they want their dog at their wedding and what the most important aspects that they want their dog to be a part of are,” MacLean says. Warr notes that most dogs don’t benefit from being present at the event, sun-up to sun-down: “No dog can really attend a full wedding, start to finish, unless it’s short and calm.”

Even social dogs will probably prefer some time by themselves or one-on-one, with their dedicated attendant. “We assess the needs of each individual dog to figure out what parts they should and shouldn’t attend, and how they should be involved,” Warr continues, emphasizing that all dogs need support come wedding day. “Of course, dogs aren’t actually kids, but we have an evidence-based understanding that their cognitive capabilities are a lot like a human toddler.” This analogy — thinking of our dogs a bit like little kids in this context — can help couples make realistic decisions.

Involve your dog in spirit

If you decide your big day will be a little too big for your dog to handle, don’t sweat it. There are plenty of ways to honor them in spirit. Plus, dogs don’t know what weddings are, so they won’t feel left out.

“I have had many different couples incorporate their dog at the ceremony without them physically being there,” MacLean says. “Cake toppers made to look like the dog is eating a piece out of the cake is one of my favorite ways.” Fifty-seven percent of pet parents in WeddingWire’s survey said they featured their dog in wedding decor. Some display favorite photos on reception tables or include custom-made stickers in their party favors. Few even go so far as to have life-size cardboard cutouts or set up a dog-treat bar where guests can grab doggie bags to bring back to their own pups.

Your dog’s presence doesn’t have to be tangible to be felt. “Almost always, if our couple has a dog, their signature cocktails will be named after them,” Elise says. Warr says they’ve had multiple couples FaceTime their dog into their reception or even film a short prerecorded video to play ahead of dinner. “It’s normal for people to feel guilty if they’re unable to involve their dog in a big life event,” they explain. “It’s OK to feel that loss. It’s also important to do what’s in the best interest of both your dog and yourself.”

Make the choice that’s best for you

No matter what your wedding looks like, one thing is certain: Your dog will love you for the rest of their life. That’s a relationship worth celebrating every day.