Should You Let Your Pets Say Goodbye When One of Them Is Put Down?

Saying goodbye to your dog or cat is one of the most difficult things in life. As pet parents, it’s hard to wrap our heads around the fact that they won’t be around anymore, and frankly, we’d rather not face it. But being there for them in their last moments not only comforts them; it can also help you begin to grieve. Does it do the same for the other, surviving pets in the house?

These days, it’s more common for the whole fam to be present at the euthanasia of a pet. This ginger cat was allowed to say goodbye to his feline friend who passed away, even offering gentle licks at the end. And this pup stuck by his bestie’s side before she crossed the rainbow bridge.

Here’s why experts say it’s actually beneficial for pets be there when it’s to time to say goodbye or to see their fellow pet one last time after they have passed.

Do dogs and cats understand death? 

The truth is that we don’t really know how pets perceive the death of another dog or cat in the house. 

“Dogs and cats may or may not understand death, per se, like humans, but they understand change in routine, which can be sudden at times with the passing of a housemate,” says Dr. Amanda Rigterink, a board-certified veterinary behaviorist at Veterinary Behavior of Indiana.  

So, your dog or cat may pick up on cues from their pet parent that something has shifted. Your cat or dog might also sense that something is wrong before another pet passes. While most evidence is anecdotal, a study in the Journal of Veterinary Behavior noted that more than half of surveyed veterinarians reported behavioral changes in nearby animals when another animal died, likely due to “detecting scent of chemical changes in the dying body, awareness that the animal is ill and/or deceased, empathy,” and other observances. 

“I think that generally pets are able to sense, probably through smell, that the other pet is ill or dying,” says Dr. Faith Banks, a certified hospice and palliative care veterinarian and the founder of Midtown Mobile Veterinary Hospice Services in Toronto. 

While they wouldn’t understand that a veterinarian is in the home to euthanize them, “I do think they are able to tell once the pet has passed,” she notes. “But what I have seen over the years is that when a pet does go over to sniff and smell the deceased one, they’re not there for that long. I think somewhere in their brains, they understand the pet has died and is gone.”

Do pets notice when a fellow dog or cat disappears? 

“Dogs and cats can understand when a housemate is gone, and many do show signs of grief and missing them,” Dr. Rigterink says. “They may notice changes in routine, scent, and social interaction, which can trigger a grief-like response.”  

Grief can manifest in pets in a few ways: 

• Searching for their friend who has passed 

• Waiting by doors 

• Loss of interest in play or eating   

• Any other unusual behaviors that don’t align with your pet’s personality

“[Grieving] may last a period of time, sometimes a few weeks, until the dog and cat get back into a new routine without their housemate,” Dr. Rigterink says. “It is important during the grieving period to keep routines as consistent as possible, consider gradual changes rather than sudden ones, and make sure you offer extra comfort and attention during this transitional period.”   

Dr. Banks says that if symptoms persist, you should head to a vet to rule out other health issues. 

Your vet may also be able to give advice on how to manage your dog or cat’s stress if the behavior is related to grief, Dr. Rigterink adds. 

So, should you let your pets say goodbye to each other?

There is no right or wrong answer; every family is different. But many experts and pet parents say that they recommend the experience to provide pets a sense of “closure.”

However, if the euthanasia will take place in a veterinary hospital, you probably shouldn’t bring another animal along — unless they are exceptionally calm and enjoy visiting the vet, and you have the vet’s permission. Still, most experts do not recommend this. 

“It could be a lot, and the surviving dog or cat may not understand what is going on in the hospital setting with all the smells,” Dr. Rigterink says. “If there was an ideal environment to do this, it would be at home with as little stress as possible to make it as peaceful as possible. A lot of times, it is best to let your dog or cat see and smell the body after euthanasia… if this can be done calmly and safely.” 

Here are some first accounts from Reddit pet parents who let their pets say goodbye to their dying pets:

• “I had to put down my 12-year-old Cane Corso and when I brought him home for burial, his best friend (Chow) sniffed all around and sat with him while I dug his grave. About 30 minutes after, I looked out the window and the Chow, along with my five cats had all encircled the grave and stayed there for almost an hour. So, yes. They need to say goodbye.”

• “I personally think it’s better than having one just disappear, leaving the other lost. Once [my cat] had peacefully passed, we opened the door and let the other cat see her. I think he understood.”

• “We brought our then three-year-old Chihuahua mix to the vet when we had to put my 14-year-old Heeler mix down. My wife held him, while I held my old girl. When she passed, our three-year-old dog immediately sniffed her and then cuddled into my wife. He knew… He never tried to search for her (as he would do when she was out on a walk or at the vet). I think it definitely helps the other dog.”

• “I find it easier for the pets left behind if they know. They don’t have to go through that period of wondering where they are, and searching for them. Either way, they are going to mourn the lost pet eventually. If they know, they start mourning right away. I find the searching stage even more heartbreaking than the mourning stage when they don’t know.”

Dr. Banks recommends saying goodbye in a home environment. She adds that pet parents shouldn’t worry that their own emotions will upset the remaining dog or cat. In her experience, most animals in the home will observe the family saying goodbye, then say goodbye themselves. 

“We have found that when pets are present, and they get to sniff and smell and lie with their pet… we feel that their pet sort of gets it and understands, and so they’re not sort of walking around looking for them,” Dr. Banks says. “Usually they’ll hop into the basket [where the pet was euthanized], they’ll sniff, and then they’ll pop out and walk away. Or a dog will go over, sort of sniff different spots, and then move along. They smell, they understand, and they move along to some degree.” 

“Even if they’re not present [during euthanasia],” Dr. Banks adds, “we do tend to go get the other pet and bring them to allow them to sniff and smell.” 

What happens next depends on the individual pet. “It could take a second [to say goodbye],” Dr. Banks explains. “Or sometimes, they’re quite curious, and they’ll get quite up close and personal with the deceased pet.” 

If your surviving pet isn’t present during your goodbye, it’s OK to ask the veterinarian to keep the deceased pet’s body at home for a short amount of time. This allows the other pet say goodbye on their own terms, Dr. Banks adds.  

Do animals grieve the same way we do? 

You might wonder, though, if your dog or cat understands what exactly has happened — and how. 

While there’s no concrete evidence on whether dogs have the ability to mourn, one study in Nature found that the majority of pet parents surveyed noticed behavioral changes indicating grief in their dogs. That’s only anecdotal evidence, however.

And if companion animals do grieve, the time span is likely to be shorter than in humans. In the study, for example, only about 25 percent of pet parents surveyed noticed mourning-like behavior lasting more than six months. 

“I don’t think [grief in pets] lasts like it would in people,” Dr. Banks says. “I’ve never heard of a situation where someone has said, ‘It's been six months and my dog is still grieving.’ Everybody talks about how pets live in the moment, you know? I think they focus on what their life is at that time. Certainly they have memories; they remember things, but I think that their focus is on the here and now.”

Death is an inevitable part of life that’s heartbreaking for humans — and likely difficult for our pets as well. If you’ve ever lost someone close to you and didn’t have the chance to say goodbye properly, you know how it feels. So, it makes sense that your pets should also be allowed to say farewell to their friends.

“I do think they get it,” Dr. Banks says. “It’s like it offers a closure almost.”